Anxiously Seeking Significance


andy-goldsworthy-2art by Andy Goldsworthy


I find my life has become mundane. Where my most exciting moments are about my crazy cat or my aging mother. I don’t often talk about the office because, let’s face it, it’s just another office. I love the people I work with I really do. If I had a magic wand I would be making a living in art. I just haven’t had the balls to do that yet.

I have this empty space in my mind, heart and soul right now and I am looking for something significant to fill it up with. I’m still single so it could be that I’m seeking companionship. I’ve really been neglecting my studio so maybe I need to immerse myself for an entire week. I miss my son but I won’t see him for quite some time yet. I’ve started working on my health and have lost 8 pounds in 4 weeks. All of these things are not that inspiring to me. There is something else missing.

I need a cause, perhaps a higher purpose. I need some depth in my life because at the moment I feel I could be blown away by the slightest breeze. I don’t feel like I am contributing anything meaningful.

This void, this void, what is this void?

2 responses »

  1. I get where you’re at. Sometimes it is just about putting one foot in front of the other and nothing more.

    If you haven’t been in the studio recently, then (here is where I’m not going to should on you) could you try doing something that is on your ‘honey do’ list? (honey do this, honey do that) What is something that you’ve always told yourself you’d do. Is this the time to pick it off and jump start some other emotion? What about doing something out of character, like signing karaoke (unless you already do that), go to Remick Rapids with your sketch book, take a class at The Studio Café, draw and write with your opposite hand … for a whole day.

    BTW *I* should talk … trying to walk that walk right now … me, I’m trying to finish up projects that I have started and haven’t brought to fruition. ;D

  2. I do plan to pack sketch book and picnic this saturday when I hit the bike trails. I have to fit fitness in with my art…its all a balancing act I suppose. TY for the recs Mimi

    ps..I do sing karaoke with the glorious Miss China Doll

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